Thank you, Jonghyun, for the joy you brought me in high school. Your music carried me through difficult times, and because of you I was able to make so many new friends at school and online. You helped me feel like I belonged, like I was a part of something when I really needed it. I was so happy when I saw SHINee in concert on my birthday four years ago, I was screaming your name the whole time. And now, I finally made it to Seoul– I worked hard in high school, got into a good college, and received funding to study abroad. I’m visiting Seoul for the first time. Because I was your fan, I started having an interest in Korean music and pop culture. It’s been surreal to finally arrive here, and then to find out the news hours later. 

You never knew me and I never actually knew you– only what I could gather from videos, pictures, and information online. I knew the you that you presented to the public. Nonetheless, your presence continues to be so meaningful to me, and your music still moves me. I cried when you cried and laughed so hard when you were up to your silly antics with others. I want to hear your music and your voice, I haven’t for a while, but I don’t think I can bare to do so yet. Thank you for bringing happiness, purpose, and belonging to countless people like me. I’m sorry for all of the pain you faced alone. I’m sorry that you sought help to no avail. You tried to bear your pain while also relieving the pain of your fans. You always tried to be positive and radiant. Thank you for everything you’ve given to those who knew and loved you. I’ll never forget how much you impacted my life.